“Did you see it?  It was HILARIOUS!”  “YES! I did see it, and it WAS hilarious!”

That has been the conversation amongst some as we’ve watched Saturday Night Live (SNL) lampoon politics over the past year.  Whether it was Hillary, Donald or any other, it was great comedy and exactly what we needed.

This past year has been a year anger, angst, and constant confrontations between people.  I can’t turn on the news, open Facebook or read a tweet without being accosted by someone letting me know their opinions on the current state of affairs in the United States.  Although I am a firm believer in the right to free speech, I’ve had to take a break and look at the lighter side of the world as to keep my spirit up and my mental state in tact.

Politically, SNL has gotten this right.  It doesn’t matter if you’re on the left or the right, they’ve been spot on in using humor to help people deal with the all of changes that are currently going on.

Humor has that kind of power.  Whether you follow politics or not, we all deal with the stressors that come with change…both personally and professionally.

Aside from the documented health benefits from maintaining a sense of humor, humor has many other applications for us as we go about our daily lives.

Humor makes the scary, less scary.  It gives us control.  Some issues we face seem larger than ourselves or what we can deal with.  When we can laugh at the issue, it decreases in psychological size. It becomes smaller. It no longer controls us, we control it.  Dr. John Morreall, a professor of Philosophy at the college of William and Mary, wrote that “humor is freedom…and incompatible with fear.”  I like the freedom that humor gives me in tackling tough issues.

Many times when facing a tough situation, I’ll play the “what if?” game.  What if my boss wasn’t an ass and wore a tutu to work?  What if I wasn’t broke and money did grow on trees?  What if the constitution was changed and Schwarzenegger could be President?  The “what if?” makes me laugh and puts me in the driver’s seat.  “What if?” shows the humor and humor gives control.

Humor can make a bad situation, more bearable.  It allows us to cope.  I have a good friend of mine that served in Iraq during the height of the war surge.  Part of his duties were to coordinate with the morgue in getting fallen soldiers back home to the US.  In his first dealings with the junior soldiers that were working there, he was appalled that they would joke around while working.  Later, after reflecting on it, he realized humor was the only way they could deal with the horrific job they had.  Many of the bodies they prepped were people that they knew, their friends.  Humor gave them the emotional distance they needed to do that job.  It wasn’t out of disrespect, it was the the necessary means to an end.  Humor can be dark but it is in the darkness that humor brings us into the light.

Finding the humor in the darkness isn’t always easy but it can work.  After my first divorce (yes, first), I put my ex-wife’s picture on a dart board and charged my co-workers a dollar a dart to help me pay for my divorce.  Was that dark humor?  You bet…but it helped me cope (and also paid the lawyer).  Humor made the crappy, less crappy and less crappy helped me cope.  It’ll help you too.

Humor makes the risky, less risky.  It can shift our perspective.  Have you ever been so close to a problem that you can’t see it from any other view?  I know I have.  Looking at the situation humorously turns it on side and opens up a whole new world of possibilities.  Allen Klein, in his classic book “The Healing Power of Humor” wrote that “Humor lends a fresh eye…when we can find some humor in our upsets, they no longer seem as large or as important as they once did.”

Parallel to my “what if” exercise, for gaining perspective, I use the “what’s the worse that can happen game?” in order to to get a new view (using humor) if confronting an issue.  Again, using a funny outcome to get perspective.  It’s either going work out like I want…or it is not.  If not, what’s the funny “worse that can happen?”  For instance, I speak to large groups of people for a living.  If it goes great, they cheer my name and throw roses at me.  If not, what the worse that could happen?  They rant my name and throw flaming bags of poo at me (which by the way, has never happened).  Yes, you should book me for your next meeting (shameless plug).  Finding a humorous “what’s the worse” scenario makes me laugh and laughing puts it ALL in perspective.

Humor makes tough conversations, more fluid.  It facilitates better communication.  Life is full of tough conversations, especially as a leader.  One of my first supervisors in the Navy was great at injecting humor into conversations.  Regardless of what fire was being extinguished (usually due to a mistake I made), he’d find the humor in it and share.  It put both of us at ease and then we could find the learning from the situation.  He could’ve yelled and had an angry outburst (it was certainly warranted) but he chose a different route where I’d be more receptive. When people are angry, their ears are off.  It was Herbert Gardner that said, “When people are laughing, they’re listening.”

I always have a joke on the ready.  It can be used anywhere when things get tight in a conversation.  If jokes aren’t your thing, try the “you don’t see (or hear or witness) that everyday”  phrase when something is amiss and tension needs to be averted in a conversation.  Just don’t do it with your wife’s cooking.  I tried it there and it failed miserably.  It does, however, work with ugly babies.  You don’t see a baby like that every day!  A little humor won’t give you stress free communication but it certainly will help grease the skids for something worthwhile.

The implications for all of these applications of humor are quite simple….don’t get mad, find something to laugh about.  You know what you find funny.  Don’t let the humor elude you, be proactive in finding the humor in all that you do.

I don’t talk politics with people but I will talk about humor and what I think is funny.  I applaud SNL for taking the angst many have felt over the past year and giving them an opportunity to have control, cope, get perspective, and start conversations.  We all need the respite humor provides when things are awry.

It doesn’t make a difference what is currently stressing you out or causing you angst, humor can help do all these things and more.  John Lennon sang, “All you need is love.”  In today’s stressed out, anger filled world, I would say, “All you need is laughs.”