WHY did I climb it!?  It could have been because it was there.  It might have been because I was feeling “youthful” after spending the day with family and friends.  Or, there could have just been a brief interruption of oxygen to my brain that impaired my decision making ability.  Regardless of the reason, I found myself 12 feet off the ground, sitting on a branch in a tree, pondering how I was going to get down.

Noticing my conundrum, my wife, Gwen, rushed up to the tree to offer assistance.  Not wanting to be a bother, I let her know that I could get down on my own.

“No, I’ll go get a ladder,” she insisted.

I maintained that I was quite capable of getting out of this on my own and, as she stepped away, I leaped from the branch to the ground.  OUCH!!  I landed hard!  All 220 pounds of me belly flopped onto the earth below.

As I laid there, face down (with a small puff of dust emerging with every exhale), Gwen asked sheepishly, “Are you okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine,”  I replied.  “I thought I was much closer to the ground.”

“Hmm, perception isn’t always reality, is it!?”  she said.

Truer words could have not been spoken.  My perception was that I WAS much closer to the ground.  The reality was, I wasn’t.  My perception was the I WAS very “cat like” and agile.  The reality was, I wasn’t.  My perception was that I WAS as light as I was when I was 10 and regularly jumped from trees.  The reality was that I’ve eaten WAY too many donuts to even think that was true.  As I hobbled to the house to grab some ibuprofen and an ice pack, I thought about those words: “perception not being reality.”    And, how true that had been in SO many situations I had faced in my life.  That, delving into a situation without looking at the reality almost always resulted in a bad outcome – losing time, money, or even (as in this case) causing pain.

Have you found the same?  Not to negate the power of possibility but if you’d like to move ahead faster, smarter and with less pain, here’s how to do it realistically:

1.  Rely on pictures, not mirrors.  Let’s face it, mirrors lie to us.  When I look in a mirror, I see exactly what I want to see.  When I see a picture, I see what is really there.  To get the reality of a situation, we need to get a good picture of what it is from other people.  Ask questions of those who know are familiar or can give you an accurate assessment of it.  Relying on your own perception of the situation without getting a clear picture from others is not reality and can trip the evolution up.

2.  Manage the reality. When I manage the perception of a situation and not the reality, I can spend an inordinate amount of time working on (and worrying about) things that don’t matter and don’t contribute in getting the result I need.  Conversely, if I work on what is REAL, I can allocate the right resources, time, and energy to what needs to get done.  In today’s world of limited resources (including my own time), I need to concentrate everything I have strategically to what is real.

3.  Accept (and even ask for) help.  There are two schools of thought when looking at bringing others in on solving a situation or reaching a goal.  One is, “too many cooks spoil the broth.”  The other is, “many hands make light work.”  If you have gotten a clear picture of what the situation is and you are managing the reality of what is going on, you will know which philosophy will apply to this situation.  If I had accepted (or even asked) for help in getting out of that tree, I would have had a MUCH better result.

After a month of hobbling around and eating ibuprofen like gummi bears, I finally healed and am “wiser for the wear.”  Could I have jumped out of that tree like a 10 year old “cat like” boy without injury to my body (or pride)?  Sure, it was possible…but not probable.  Please be aware, I am NEVER against possibility.  Possibility takes us places we never thought we could go.  However, I could have avoided all of that down time and pain if I had gotten a clear picture, managed the reality, and accepted help (and realized that my perception of the situation was NOT the reality).    When we add reality to possibility we not only perceive things clearer, we also increase the PROBABILITY of getting done what we need to get done.